WEEKLY ANNOUNCEMENTS:
It isn’t Tuesday
Cassidy accidentally cosplayed as Kim Possible during an important meeting yesterday.
Cassidy and Isabella have become obsessed with Glen Powell. Enamored. Charmed. Every time Isabella sees a picture of him, she tells herself “okay no need to send this one to cassidy it’s just another picture of glen powell” BUT SHE CANNOT STOP HERSELF.
Cassidy is seeing Twisters this weekend (See Announcement #3 as to why this is important).
In a span of 24 hours, two pairs of Cassidy’s glasses broke AND her credit card was stolen.
Cassidy
I’m not entirely sure how I keep convincing you to read Tessa Bailey books but I do. This week we read one of her Christmas romances Window Shopping.
Stella has recently been released from prison and is wandering the streets of New York looking at the store windows decorated for Christmas. While standing in front of one in particular, she meets Aiden. Aiden is the general manager of the store whose window she is in front of. He asks her what she thinks of the window and tells her to apply to be their new window designer, as they both agree the penguin’s wrapping presents that are currently there suck. Aiden hires Stella on a trial basis before eventually hiring her. At first, they deny their attraction to one another because he’s now her boss, but eventually they have to decide if they’re going to give in or not.
Listen, I know you said you hated this book. But if I sat here and typed the same thing I’d be lying. Was it good???? No. Did I have fun??? Yes.
Isabella
Isabella did NOT have fun. She HATED it. THIS MONTH IS MAKING ME HATE CHRISTMAS. I HATED THIS BOOK SO MUCH.
I mean, generally, I have a hard time with Tessa Bailey but this book blew me away with how much I hated it. I WILL have highlights and evidence to share.
I cannot WAIT to see your evidence. It’s gonna make me crack up.
I don’t know, I just think Bailey’s books tend to be better when they’re a bizarre little bit. Like with My Killer Vacation, which after we read it we decided that’s the book of hers people should read. I’m not saying people should read this. It was just wacky enough to keep me entertained. And like, as you and JTPC readers know I’ll read anything.
Here’s my thing though. I’m never saying that my taste is impeccable or that I don’t like bad stuff.
Here are my credentials:
I own all of Criminal minds on DVD.
My favorite show is True Blood.
If I think of Ewan McGregor too much, I cry.
I sometimes listen to Anna Kendrick on purpose.
But I cannot stand Tessa Bailey. I don’t get it. I will never understand the hype with Tessa Bailey. Or people who think she writes the spiciest stuff on the planet. Maybe I do understand those people in that they haven’t been exposed to anything else. Maybe that would shock their system though. IDK NOT THE POINT.
PLEASE. PLEASE:
“You’re my type,” she blurts. The music behind me stops.”
Girl shut up. ENOUGH. I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS BULLSHIT TESSA. SHE WROTE THAT IN EARNEST. IT IS NOT A BIT.
If people who exclusively read Tessa Bailey read anything we’ve ever read (both JTPC and for just us) it might take them out.
Her book’s are easy to read so I get why they're popular, they're also just hit or miss for me. And like, I knowwwwww she’s known for her books being spicy but frankly some of these sex scenes are just embarrassing. Particularly the ones here, LIKE THE ONE AT THE BAR???
EMBARRASSING!!!!!!!
Something that always makes the sex scenes bizarre to me is that her characters forget their characters and act completely different than they actually would. It’s jarring. It would almost be better if she wrote her “spicy” scenes first and built around them. Maybe I’d believe the books a little bit more.
She writes things like, and this is a REAL QUOTE. A REAL QUOTE FROM THIS BOOK. AN ACTUAL REAL GENUINE QUOTE: “Our kiss is a perfect assault.”
JESUS CHRIST TESSA SHUT UP. ENOUGH!!!!!! RAISE YOUR HAND IF YOU’VE EVER BEEN PERSONALLY VICTIMIZED BY TESSA BAILEY HOLY SHIT!!!!
Oh that's so true. Her characters having sex vs living their everyday lives are SOOOO different. It’s probably one of the more bizarre things about her books. They don’t often make sense when you think about the book in a larger sense. Like the way Stella would act???? Just does NOT make sense for this tough character Bailey was trying to write. Like definitely not that soon in to knowing Aiden. There was no earning that character shift.
LMAOOO I HATED THAT LINE. I got to it and let out like an ugly cackle. Because what was that?
Stella is the worst character in the Tessa Bailey universe IMO. Which is saying something. Because most of her characters are just so cringe. For example, another quote: “I’m not what one would refer to as approachable. In fact, I’m fluent in Fuck Off.” She radiates, “I’m not like other girls” but SHE IS SO LIKE OTHER TESSA BAILEY CHARACTERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think what adds to the cringe is that this is Tessa’s pandemic book.
Yeah Stella is NOT great. Even Aiden felt too much like a caricature to really vibe with his character. Honestly I found the secondary characters way more entertaining. Like her friend from the makeup department and the janitor (also sorry for the life of me I cannot remember their names and my tablet is dead so we will NOT be checking) ??? Fascinating, interesting. Normal???? They were a good balance to whatever was going on with Stella and Aiden.
Oh I had no idea this was her pandemic book until after I had started reading it. It’s so weird because it so easily could have made no mention of it. It felt a little forced in, and honestly???? Unneeded.
Right like she was just trying to name drop covid. We were there girlie!!! We remember!!! Cause covid still exists!!!!
I also realize that a common romance novel convention is the scary-fast timeline, and that it’s extra fast when it’s a christmas romance. But they start talking about something called A LOVE CONTRACT almost IMMEDIATELY. Stella at first reacts normally but then she’s obsessed and it’s game over. Maybe that part is realistic.
The most realistic part to me was when Stella was like we CANNOT SIGN THIS LOVE CONTRACT IT’S BEEN A WEEK SINCE WE’VE MET. Like yeah exactly girl. It’s been a week. I think maybe this book could have benefited from a smidge of a time skip. Like start having Stella work at Vivant around early November??? And then jump to Christmas. Build the sexual tension a little more before they agree to sign the contract.
I think that points to a big problem I had with the book: the mechanics. They felt so elaborate and forced. Why exactly does she have a federal crime on her record? Why does the love contract even need to be mentioned? Covid?
I know I’m being too harsh on this book, but I’m allowed to not like things. I just don’t understand the hype and devotion around Tessa Bailey. I’d be a happier girl if I did.
The love contract thing makes sense to me in that Aiden is her boss, and there’s absolutely power dynamics there. So sure they should probably make HR involved so Stella doesn’t get screwed over. Everything else??? I don’t get it.
You can not like things!!! Idk I probably was just in a silly enough mood last week (see: my glasses and credit card situation) that something wacky was gonna hit just right. Which this did. Any other time??? When already in a weird mood?? Eh.
AS ALWAYS DO THEY STAY TOGETHER AFTER THE BOOK ENDS?
NO.
no 💜
What Else Has Cassidy Read This Week Reviewed By Emojis?
Witch Hat Atelier, Vols. 1-7 by Kamome Shirahama - 🥺🫣🥺😧